We are all supposed to be happy – right? It is even written in the Constitution of the United States of America that we are guaranteed “Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.” So, what happens if we aren’t “happy?” Is there something wrong with us?

In fact, we are so geared into the fact (or is it fantasy) that we are supposed to be happy, that we take pills to make us not feel our feelings and instead feel happy. Some of us call them our “happy pills!”

I am calling happiness – and the pursuit of it – a myth. And the reason is that, in my opinion, we will never be truly happy under the conditions we set for what happiness entails.

There is the typical “I’ll be happy when ….” statements. The blank space is generally fall in love, get married, find the perfect job, when the kids are out of the house, when the bills are paid, have the right car or whatever.

The problem is, what if … doesn’t happen – then are we unhappy?

Maybe yes, maybe no.

Question: what happens if you aren’t happy? Are you wrong? Is there something wrong with you? Should you get help?

So, here is another question – what exactly is happiness? What if we put too much pressure on this whole thing of happiness? What if happiness is really something that comes and goes? What if there are only moments of happiness and the rest is just OK? Can you live with that?

I am sure, like me, as a child you were asked, “Are you happy?” and you knew you needed to say “yes” even if you weren’t exactly sure if you were happy because you weren’t really sure what happy felt like. Was getting a something you always wanted happiness? Was having your parent kiss you good night and tuck you into bed happiness? Was playing with a new kitten happiness? Maybe they all are – and maybe they are just life.

What is happiness to you? Is it OK to not be happy? What about all the other emotions/feelings such as anger, shame, guilt, envy, sadness, regret, disappointment, fear, anxiety and all the others? Are they bad?

In my next segment I am going to go over these other feelings and discuss the good and the bad of each.

In the meantime, please reply to my blog and write me your thoughts.

P.S. How about if I said that all feelings are good?

Responses to The Myth of Happiness

Dani on May 6, 2015 at 7:27 pm
Awesome read Judith! Nicely written!