Like most of you, I was horrified to witness what happened to our Capitol this past week. Because of manipulated and hateful rhetoric by a narcissus and his cronies, we have witnessed for the first time in American history the transfer of power being interrupted by gangs and hoodlums. Because of this, 5 souls have lost their lives.
These are dark times, indeed. And yes, this all has proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that our country is divided. However, I cannot believe that this is the end of what our founders dreamed of when they signed the Declaration of Independence. America has come through some horrible times before. In my 71 years, I have lived through many of them. Most of the turmoil I have witnessed is due to one side believing they are superior to another – usually white against black. This MUST stop! As has been said many times, “We all bleed the same color.” This fear that creates hatred, killing, and war against each other must stop. Yes, I do believe that what happened at the Capitol was not just about a certain group believing that a certain President is better than another, but rather about hate and separateness that has been accentuated by our current administration.
THE META VIEW
We must stop and question if we genuinely believe the hatred and discontent we feel is worth the damage we are doing? I have found that I will often make up stories in my head about a perceived slight from someone…why they looked at me a certain way, said something to me, or did not respond to me the way I wanted or expected them to. These stories are always very egocentric – all about me. When I stop and take the MetaView and slip out of my own beliefs about things, I can see things from a whole different perspective. No longer am I just looking from my own level at things – but through the MetaView I rise above the situation and see both sides. Often when I take this view, I leave my bias and hurts behind and see that there is a whole other side to the situation – other possibilities.
What is the meaning of what is happening? What is the issue? What is needed? What can we learn
about what really works and what does not work? The MetaView perspective continually seeks healing through understanding.
This is what we all need to do now. Take a breath – a deep belly breath – and slowly let it out and allow yourself to rise above your way of seeing and feeling things. This way you might really see how the other side may be feeling. This allows you to be “in question” rather than our normal view, “in answer.” To be “in question” allows us to see what else is possible. How many arguments could be avoided if we just stop and see what the other person might be going through. This is a much higher level of being than our very childlike vision of only our own view. When we are able to start taking the MetaView, perhaps we can begin to heal.
FROM A SPICE COMPANY
Yes, a spice company. Penzey’s, located in Cedarburg, WI, wrote a powerful essay and sent it along with their sale advertisement. I have copied and pasted this here as I believe their words might help us to begin the healing.
“Certainly not today, and maybe not tomorrow, but most likely soon, all of us will find ourselves doing our part to help heal Republicans. Seventy million Americans have been lied into voting for the most un-American administration in our lifetimes. As much as we don’t need the approval of those seventy million to get America back to being America, those seventy million are our family, co-workers, neighbors and friends and they need our help.
At this moment after all the cruelty they made possible you may well be thinking: I’m not helping that. I get it, but I also know as a cook your heart is not one that can stay closed for long to anyone in need, even if they brought that need upon themselves. What will your help look like? You have some time to plan that out. From grief there is the path of denial, anger, bargaining, depression and finally acceptance. With just how long Republicans have been in denial, I’m guessing the anger stage we are now beginning to enter will be both long and intense. Once they start getting past the anger our chance to help will begin.
As much as we have a lot of Republican anger, and even a fair amount of denial yet, to work through we can still begin planting the seeds for what comes next. Though this administration never did make much of an effort to build the promised wall around our borders, like so many cults they were very successful in building a wall around their followers to block out any voice of reason. Breaching that wall with a simple text or email with something along the lines of: “Saw a clip of that movie we liked, thinking of you” to let them know you have not given up on them might be the first step. You are creative and have good judgement. I trust that you can figure this out.
You certainly have every right to look at the horrors of this week and be horrified by them, but this really has been the first so very needed step in getting our loved ones back. Those who crafted and told and broadcast the lies that made these last four years happen have to be held accountable. But once those lies stop, if we can find a space in our hearts for those who believed the lies there is hope that what comes next doesn’t have to be a never-ending cycle of outrage and retribution.
Everything that has made you a cook has prepared you to heal this world. These next few years will need your healing more than you can possibly imagine.”
Let us feel all our righteous rage and express our horror but also let us dare to find what we can agree on. I suspect we agree on more than we disagree on. Yes, I realize the things we disagree on are of dire and life-threatening consequence right now. Let us at least try to humanize one another so we don’t wind up like Nazi Germany or Rwanda. We need healing now more than ever, and it starts with us as individuals. Social change goes hand-in-hand with individual healing. Let’s do our part!